Reflecting on self-acceptance

Before we can move to healthier ways, we must be where we actually are. Radical self-acceptance is a connecting, soft, slow, and compassionate way of being. We can help each other. When you see your “sister” beating up on herself, take her weapons away and just hold her.
-Sark in Succulent Wild Woman

Reflecting on Wholeness . . .

Egocentricity trying to understand whole mind (true nature, inherent adequacy, wholeness, etc.) is like your toaster trying to understand electricity.
- Cheri Huber

Reflecting on optimism . . .

THE OUTLAW CATALOG OF CAGEY OPTIMISM By: Rob Brezsny


The manual called the DSM-IV. identifies scores of pathological states but no healthy ones.
In 2002, I began to complain about this fact, and asked readers to help me compile material for a proposed antidote, the Anti-DSM--a compendium of healthy, exalted, positive states of being. As their entries came in, we at the Beauty and Truth Laboratory were inspired to dream up some of our own. Below is part one of our initial attempt at creating an Anti-DSM-IV, or as we also like to call it, The Outlaw Catalog of Cagey Optimism.

* MODULATED RAPTURISM. Welcoming miracles and peak experiences in full awareness that the growth they initiate will require sober commitment and disciplined work to complete.
* NONRESENTMENT SYNDROME. Having an ability to be friendly, open, and helpful to people with whom you disagree.
* NOT HAVING TO BE RIGHT. Fostering an ability, even a willingness, to be proven wrong about one of your initial perceptions or pet theories; having an eagerness to gather information that may change your mind about something you have fervently believed; cultivating a tendency to enjoy being corrected, especially about ideas that are negative or hostile.
* ORGIASTIC LUCIDITY. Experiencing an expansive and intricate state of clarity while in the midst of extreme sensual pleasure.
* PERMANENT DIVINE INFATUATION. Having not the abstract understanding but rather a direction perception that the Divine Intelligence, who recreates the universe fresh every moment, is deeply in love with you, even as you are in love with the Divine Intelligence.
* RADICAL CURIOSITY. Characterized by the following traits: an enthusiasm for the mystery embedded in the mundane; a preference for questions over answers; an aversion to stereotyping, generalizations, and jumping to conclusions; a belief that people are unsolvable puzzles; an inclination to be unafraid of both change and absence of change; a strong drive to avoid boredom; a lack of interest in possessing or dominating what you are curious about.
* RELENTLESS UNPRETENTIOUSNESS. Possessing a strong determination to not take yourself too seriously, not take your cherished beliefs too literally, and not take other people's ideas about you too personally.
* ROOTED IN ETERNITY. The state of knowing that your true identity is deeper than the constant chatter of thoughts, images, and feelings that swirls through your mind.
* SACRED PERCEPTIVENESS. Seeing others for who they really are, in both their immaturity and genius, and articulating your insights to them with care.
* SCARY-THUNDER-IN-THE-DARK HAPPINESS. Feeling deliciously safe in a well-protected sanctuary during a severe storm.
* SCHIZOFRIENDIA. Hearing voices in your head that are constantly supportive, encouraging, and keen to offer advice that helps you make the most of every experience.
* SELF-ACCEPTANCE UNDER PRESSURE. The state achieved upon leaving a room filled with people who know you, and not worrying about what anyone will say about you.
* SLY TRUST. Having a discerning faith that the integrity of your efforts will inevitably lead to a result that's exactly what you need; being skillful in the art of never trying too hard.
* SONGBIRD-IN-A-TREE. The cultivated awareness that daily life presents countless opportunities to be buoyed by moments of ordinary extraordinary beauty, and that these moments are most available if you perceive with your senses and not with your internal turmoil.
* TENDER RAGE. Maintaining a strong sense of love and protectiveness towards a person or creature or institution you're angry at.
* TRANSCONSUMERISM. An absence of tendencies to predicate happiness on acquiring material possessions.
* UNSELFCONSCIOUSNESS. Doing what you're doing and being who you're being without thinking about it at all. Being happy by virtue of not worrying about whether or not you're happy; enjoying a unified state in which you are not split between the you who acts and the you who observes.
* UNTWEAKABILITY. Having a composed, blame-free readiness to correct false impressions when your actions have been misunderstood and have led to awkward consequences.
* VIRTUOSO INTEGRATION. Consistently walking your talk; effectively translating your ideals into the specific actions; creating results that are congruous with your intentions; being free of hypocrisy.
* VISIONS OF THRILLING EXPLOITS. Experiencing an eruption of intuition that clearly reveals you will attempt a certain adventure in the future, as when you spy a particular mountain for the first time and know you'll climb it one day.
* WEATHER SENSITIVITY. Having a high degree of awareness about your sensitivity to changes in the weather, and having a skill for managing your responses to those shifts so as to consistently bring out the best in yourself.
* WHOLEHEARTEDNESS. Having the capacity to give, on a moment's notice, your complete attention, empathy, and playful intelligence to any person or circumstance you choose.
* WILD DISCIPLINE. Possessing a talent for creating a kind of organization that's liberating; knowing how to introduce limitations into a situation in such a way that everyone involved is empowered to express his or her unique genius; having an ability to discern hidden order within a seemingly chaotic mess.
* WHEEEE. A serenely boisterous intensely focused chaos of communion with streaming fountains of liquid light hurtling softly through the giggly upbeat tender assurance that all is well and a mysterious unimaginable intelligence is magnetizing us forward into ever-more wonderful throbs of naked truth that bestow the humble happy sight of life as a river of fantastically lucky artful change flowing through us forever.

Today when you pause, reflect on your hands . . .

The craftsmen of the Middle Ages, thought that the spiral patterns on our fingertips are marks left by the soul entering or leaving the body. When we touch others with love, care, and attention it is a soulful act.

“Our soul merges from this mysterious place inside us and out through our fingertips, ensouling the wood we carve, the gardens we cultivate, the children and animals and lovers we touch. To me, this is a poetic way of imagining how we bring soul back into our personal lives- by paying attention to the very way we touch, as with the way we prepare food or the care we give our work or the manner in which we touch the earth.”
- Phil Cousineau

Reflecting on Acceptance . . .

Anger and tenderness: my selves.
And now I can believe they breathe in me
as angels, not polarities.
- Adrienne Rich

Reflecting on Patience . . .

Patience is not only tender, respectful and loving, it is quietly defiant; it knows how to hold its own ground. It has a calm, silent authority that insists by example what must change. It empathizes with pain and suffering but provides a way of going beyond mere endurance. You can trust its strength and wisdom. It moves slowly but it the right pace; it's always there, right behind you, offering you just the help you need. Its power is felt by others; it changes them, too.
Mary Jennings,
The Focusing Connection, November 2007

Reflecting on change . . .

All transformations are a change in consciousness.
When making a change in your life:

1. Just Begin
Anywhere is a good place to begin on the path of change. Take baby steps. With change, each day is a new beginning.

2. Give It Time
When you see the new change as a way of life, you don’t have to worry about making time to practice it.

3. Be Natural
Making a conscious change requires energy, earnestness, and sincerity, but these activities do not have to be depleting, ponderous, or strained.

4. Be Flexible
The path of change is filled with many twists and turns. It calls for a certain flexibility of action. Try not to be rigid or unbending for deters you from enjoying the surprises along the way.

5. Let Go
You are not in charge of this path. The harder you try to make things happen or perfect the process of changing, the quicker you’ll find yourself caught in the trap of disappointment. Surrender yourself to practice, and don’t worry about where it is taking you. Go with the flow.

6. Don’t Be Concerned About Externals
Make sure that your being on the path is not dependent upon external conditions. It doesn’t matter whether you’re in the right or wrong place or whether you’re depressed or optimistic. You can change any time and any place no matter what the conditions.

7. Don’t Have Expectations
Taking up the path of change is about dealing with whatever shows up in the present moment.

8. Remember Nothing Is Exactly the Same
Subtle changes are always taking place, revealing new variations on old themes. With practice you become attuned to them.

9. Welcome Bad Days
Don’t beat up on yourself for bad days when nothing seems to go right. In the big picture, even bad days have a purpose. They test our stamina and fuel our resolve.

10. Deal with Your Demons
Sometimes diligence in your practices is taken as a signal that it’s time for your demons to show up to see if they can drag you down or even stop you in your tracks. Accept them as fellow travellers along the path, know in your heart that they can also be your teachers.

11. Work with Who You Are
Change yields a rigorous and rewarding form of self-knowledge. We can’t escape who we are; we carry it around with us all the time. The work with it all, our wholeness.

12. Enjoy the Company
The path of conscious change constantly reminds us how much we need the support and companionship of others. Everyone we meet encourages us to grow by inspiring us or challenging us. Love and appreciate them all.

Adapted from writings by: Frederic and Mary Ann Brussat

Reflecting on money . . .

"Money is the most universally motivating, mischievous, miraculous, maligned, and misunderstood part of contemporary life." -Lynne Twist

Reflect on the attitudes toward money that you have picked up from your birth families, culture, and religious traditions, as well as the feelings you have over having or not having enough money. Your beliefs, habits, and ideals about this medium of exchange say a lot about your deepest longings, fears, and expectations. Money can be a carrier of your best intentions.



Spirituality of Money - Edward Hays

a) First, we should love our money. It is good to have earned it and it is a sign of a job well done.

b) It is an expression of self-love how we use it for ourselves.

c) Who and where you choose to give money to shows how you move through the world, where your energy goes and who and what you are connected to.

d) Money is an expression of your energy.

Reflect on taking yourself lightly . . .

Remember that angels can fly because they take themselves lightly.

Reflecting on Change

Every time a human being makes real progress in consciousness, the whole world for him has changed; relationships change and the outlook on the outer world for him has changed and on his own situation changes. There is complete rebirth of the world.
von Franz

Reflecting on Dreams

Everyone dreams each night whether the dreams are remembered or not. Dreaming is necessary for psychic and physical health. Dreams are an essential part of your life. Dreams are used for different purposes in different cultures. The Australian aborigines have ‘dream time’, the Navahos believe dreams are a means of communicating with the spiritual realm. Carl Jung found that dreams were a source of guidance for whole tribes in East Africa. In the shamanic traditions of North America and Central Asia, dreams and visions were a sign of a shaman’s ‘call’. In Greek times dreams were messages of divine truth. The Judeo-Christian tradition also viewed dreams as messages.
Today dreams have become part of the field of psychology and are used in analysis. Sigmund Freud discovered a basic truth about dreams, that they give a picture of the psyche as it is. Carl Jung took this discovery further to prove that dreams also provide clues for future development. He did extensive work to support the recovery of dreams as an important part of the human experience. Freud believed that symbols disguised and distorted the truth. He saw dreams as a secret code that must be deciphered. Jung believed that dreams may be revelations of unconscious wisdom but he also believed that you understand take the symbols and messages for just what it says.
Dreams were believed to sometimes give signals of the moments in life when transformation occurs. Dreams can prepare the dreamer for the next day or coming year. They can be used for increasing the possibility of making wise choices.

The Unconscious
Dreams are products of the unconscious. Jung also thought dreams could connect with the collective unconscious of humans and consists of “latent predisposition's towards identical reactions.” He saw the unconscious as housing undeveloped, unconscious portions of the personality which are “striving for integration in the wholeness of the individual.” Jung called the collective patterns and figures from the collective unconscious archetypes. An archetype is an imprint of a definite grouping of an archaic character containing mythological motifs and patterns. The collective unconscious is the repository of human experience and has taken eons to form.

Symbolic Language
Symbolic language is a language in which inner experience, feelings, and thoughts are expressed as if they were sensory experiences or events in the outer world. Time and space are not as important as intensity and association. Symbolic language is contained in dreams, myths and fairy tales. Images precedes words in the psyche. Signs in a dream point to another reality, symbols make present the other reality.
There are always two aspects of a symbol: the concrete (conscious), and the other reality (unconscious). It bridges the two realities. Symbols in dreams, religious tradition, and literature all share the quality of presenting insights into an unseen world (unconscious).
There are personal symbols, something that has become a symbol to you in your personal experience, conventional symbols such as a country’s flag and universal symbols which come from the common experience of humankind.

Key Questions for Responding to Dreams

Respond to as many questions as you choose. Let your intuition have full rein by writing whatever comes up.
1. How am I, as dream ego, acting in this dream?
2. What archetypal symbols in this dream are important to me?
3. What are the various feelings in this dream?
4. What are the various actions in this dream?
5. What relation, if any, does this dream have to what is happening right now in my life? To something in my future? To something in my personality?
6. Who or what is the archetype in this dream?
7. What is the helping or healing force in this dream?
8. What is being wounded in this dream?
9. What is being healed?
10. What would I like to avoid in this dream?
11. What actions might this dream be suggesting to me to consider?
12. What does this dream want from me?
13. What choices can I, and will I, make as a result of working with this dream?
14. Why did I need this dream?
15. Why am I not doing this in my life?
16. Why have I dreamed of ‘so and so’ now?

Dream Task
Asking a dream for clarity. The following night after a dream, ask before you sleep, “where do I go from here?”
After working with a dream:
1. Take an action in everyday life that honors what the dream has taught you.
2. Work and use the dream as information to integrate into your everyday life.
3. Some dreams can have literal material to work with.
4. Dreams can cause synchronicity to happen in waking life experience.

Working with the Dream Symbol
Relax and center yourself. Concentrate on the symbol you wish to explore. Picture it in your mind. Maintain focus on the symbol.
Answer the following questions:
1. What experiences / associations have you had with the symbol? Look back through the history of your life for times you have seen the symbol and have been involved with it in some manner.
2. What feelings does the symbol evoke in you?
3. Free- associate with the symbol. Say the name of the symbol out-loud and allow your mind to wander spontaneously to other objects or words which your unconscious mind connects it with.
4. Draw or paint the symbol. Draw it in an environment.
5. Read symbolic dictionaries and encyclopedias for the archetypal meanings associated with the symbol.
6. Create a story or fantasy that involves the symbol.
Draw one image or symbol from your dream and ask it:
1. Who or what are you?
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2. What do you have to tell me?
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3. Why are you in my art?
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4. What would you like to have happen?
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5. What more do you have to say to me?
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Title your art:
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Rules for being Human

Rules for Being Human

1. You will receive a body.
You may like it or hate it, but it will be yours for the entire period this time around.
2. You will learn lessons.
You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called life. Each day in this school you will have the opportunity to learn lessons. You may take the lessons or think them irrelevant and stupid.
3. There are no mistakes only lessons.
Growth is a process of trial and error, experimentation. The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiment that ultimately “works”.
4. A lesson is repeated until learned.
A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can then go on to the next lesson.
5. Learning lessons does not end.
There is no part of life that does not contain its lessons. If you are alive, there are lessons to be learned.
6. “There” is no better than “here”.
When your “there” has become a “here” you will simply obtain another “there” that will, again, look better than “here”.
7. Others are merely mirrors of you.
You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.
8. What you make of your life is up to you.
You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.
9. Your answers lie inside you.
The answers to life’s questions lie inside you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.
10. You will forget all this.

(I got this so long ago, I don't remember who wrote it)